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  • Writer's pictureVlada Zapesotsky

The Vision of the Inner Home

Updated: Aug 6, 2018

My latest writing piece that brings another description of how you can experience your True self and feel at Home with who you are, in the here and now. Use your imagination to see it and your heart to feel it!!

My Inner Home is a natural and safe space for my vulnerable and tender soul; for my personality with all its expressions, individual quarks, limitations, and talents; for my story, life experiences, pains and fears. It is a space where I find my imagination, my ideas, desires, and dreams; my creative potential, my strengths and resources; my knowledge, wisdom, intuition, and sensitivity; my values, inner wealth and treasures; my inner nature, my truth, my genuine self. This Home stands in the very center of my inner universe, is built from my natural materials, and expresses my very essence. It is full of various rooms and spaces; it is painted in my most tender tones and responds to my various needs and requests. In it live my childhood and adulthood pieces, inner heroes, assistants, and guardians. There may be many life lessons, challenges, callings, and hard work. But it always brings peace, tranquility, intimacy, connection and true love.

Regardless of how the life journey goes, there comes a moment when a desire to leave home, to abandon familiar space, to conquer other worlds, to explore something new and undiscovered, and sometimes even get lost on purpose to later find ourselves consciously, becomes an integral part of growing up and maturing. We begin our journey from the inside toward the outside and then use all our strength to progress further into the outside world. Sometimes during this process, we also get farther away from ourselves, get distracted by the unnecessary, get attracted to what is unlike us, overcome external hardships, only to make eventual conscious, mature choices in favor of Home, our truth, and come back to ourselves.

Thus, in our long search, we begin our journey toward the inside of our being, our unique planet. We may need to pass through many dimensions, spaces, worlds; defeat dragons, undo the evil spells cast on princesses or princes, answer many riddles, and execute various feats. Finally, we return to where we had begun, but now we feel and know every little corner of that inner space. We begin to guard and protect our Inner Home, take care of the soil around it, cultivate it, and nourish the harvest. We recover what was ours since birth. With gratitude and wisdom, we accept back our nature, our heritage, our Home—our essence.

If we miss this moment, the one when we are ready to conclude our search and wandering and return to our Inner Home, we begin to feel a certain longing, as if we had forgotten where we were going and why, as if something were pulling us back and not letting go. It is as if something were beckoning us to a place, in the past or in the future, that seems rather familiar and, at the same time, unlike anything we had seen before. We get a feeling of being lost and homeless inside, and we realize that we have a burning desire to run somewhere, except we do not know where. So, we constantly feel homesick, realizing that there is not a physical home where we want to come back to and the longing continues.

Yet, our Inner Home keeps sending us stronger signals. Our connection is not disappearing, no matter how far from it we travel or how lost we are. We just need to stop this exhausting run, this wonderful—or terrible—questioning, this search and wandering. We need to stop and tell ourselves, “I choose the road Home. I am going toward my truth, my natural potential, my soul, my creativity, my endless growth, my strengths, my world—my inner world!” We need to take the first step, just one step, in the direction that is true for each one of us. That is where our path will begin that will eventually become our true path toward ourselves.

This journey will consist of small steps or inner choices, each of which will bring us closer to living a natural, sincere, true, and real life—to feeling “at home with ourselves”. We simply need to look around and start choosing here-and-now, right where we are at the present moment. To clarify what I mean by choosing in the here-and-now, we fill our Inner Home with the foods we consume, in the clothes we wear, in the people we choose to be around, in how we spend our free time, in our chosen profession and how we carry them out, in how we build our relationships with our family, in what our physical home looks like, most importantly, what it is filled with. When choosing our truth becomes a habit, our path Home becomes clear and illuminated. Our journey fills with a genuine purpose, importance, consciousness, and life.

We can then look back and take Home with us everything that is dear to us from our personal story, what we can now recognize as part of our essence, our nature, our truth. Without it, our Inner Home would not be complete. Collecting all the natural pieces of our inner space, we gradually create and make our very safe inner container, where our genuine “I” can live, grow, develop, and share its truth with the world around. Being “at home with ourselves”, we can be at home anywhere, irrespective of the physical space, life circumstances, and external restrictions. Our Inner Home becomes our center, where we live from-inside-out, and can truly express ourselves. With this expression, we bring something new, unique, and real into the surrounding world.

Only when you come back Home to your True Self, does the real, happy labor begin. It is no longer a struggle or the path of a wanderer. It is a journey full of everyday work, peace, meaningfulness, creation, development, and love. It is The Way of Life that brings you a true feeling of belonging, connection, fulfillment and accuracy. It is a life filled with Home and Home filled with life.

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